You have a baby!...In a bar!

Yeah... that's kinda how I felt at one point on Saturday night. Not because there was an infant at the bar I was in... but because I was there having a drink with my sister. Anyway, I'm getting way ahead of myself. Let's back track a little over 24hrs. (And I promise I've never seen that movie, just the previews. Honestly! I swear!)

Anyway, rewinding a little over a day to Friday evening. I went to the home of inexpensive, but not too cheap in quality, designed with fun in mind, Swedish made furniture: Ikea! I've always loved going there, even as a little kid with my parents. It's like a giant playground only instead of swings, slides and monkey bars; they have chairs, tables and lofted beds. I was in the market for a new entertainment center and while I didn't get an "entertainment center" I did get a table for the kitchen (it's not a "kitchen table," it's taller, has less surface area, and wouldn't be good for eating on) that is going to do the job nicely (plus it matches the rest of the wood in my room unlike any of their entertainment centers). Steve bought us a nice new glass coffee table (I've foolishly picked the over on how long it will be before someone puts a foot through it, but hey, I've always been an optimist) and an awesome chair (it even has a fun name, "POÄNG")(anything with an umlaut is automatically a fun name)(yes even Mötley Crüe). Robert I'm afraid was really bored, but that's because it was his first time and he wasn't really looking to buy anything. (A special thanks to Lauren for getting us the van from Zipcar and driving us, I'd tell her she rocks, but she already knows it.)

After dinner with them I decided to go from one extreme end of the city to the other, and I met Matt and Jenny for drinks in Old Town Alexandria. We just had a few rounds at the Austin Grill down there, but I had a blast with them like I always do. Them getting married is one of those things that I can't believe is happening so soon but by the same token I can't believe it hasn't happened yet, they really are a great match a lot of fun together. I can't wait until Jenny's moved up here and they're inviting me over to their place for dinner parties, because that's what married people do right? Ok so let's be honest, that's only going to happen in Brian's delusional world of fantasy, the only meals we're going to be sharing are ordered off a menu at whatever restaurant they pick (to their credit they do know a lot of nice restaurants and I'm more than happy to let them decide).

Moving right along, Saturday afternoon was not quite but almost as bad as I'd feared it would be. I picked Nana up at 1:45 and before 2 she was already laying into me about why wasn't I in school, how I had no future and how on my present course I had no chance for "success" however she defines it. After about an hour and a half I'd finally convinced her that I was happy and that I had a plan and then she did a 180 saying how proud of me she was and how I had been raised with "true Evans values" (whatever that means) just like my father. I was kicking myself for not taking Sharice up on her offer of sedatives to slip my grandmother... if only I wasn't afraid that her old heart couldn't handle it (no that wasn't the only reason, I have a few morals, and yes I know, I'm going to hell). Needless to say I drove up there as quickly as possible without getting a ticket or yelled at too much by her. Over all she totally killed what had the potential to be an awesome drive. It was warm and sunny outside, so for the first hour I had the windows down and my stereo blasting (god XM radio is awesome on long trips like that one) but after I picked her up we were left with the AC and no music so we could talk...

Saturday night, as promised, I took my sister out for a few drinks to celebrate her 21st birthday... let me just repeat that and let it sink in... "I took my sister out for a few drinks to celebrate her 21st birthday." Yup sweet innocent little Tory is now 21. My baby sister is 21. I need a drink just thinking about it. We went to a small bar my cousin and his wife (who live in the area) had recommended to us called the Ship Inn. Getting there was a debacle and a half. A drive that should have taken 30 minutes took Tory and I 2 hours. Yeah, that's right it took four times as long as it should have. We got lost so many times I'm surprised we didn't end up half way to Pittsburgh. I blame a combination of Mapquest, Jersey country roads and a little bit of my own propensity to get lost, but mostly the first two.

Y'see country roads in Jersey like country roads in many states (including the great state of Maryland) have names and highway numbers. Only in Jersey the highway numbers stop, start and change whenever they feel like it. And mapquest, for all of it's usefulness in civilized cities and states, just can't keep up. I swear CR 579 stopped at a dead end, you had to drive down 2 other roads before you were magically on 579 again. I finally got fed up (ok I'd been fed up and frustrated for a while, but I finally swallowed my pride and admitted I couldn't do it without help) and called my mother, who found out where we were on a old fashion map (with no lack of confusion and frustration with Jersey roads on her part) and shocker it turns out I was about 3/4 of a mile from where I wanted to be.

Anyway, the bar was perfect for what I wanted for my sister and I, small, quiet and not crowded. We were able to have a few drinks in peace while a guy played some covers on an acoustic guitar. Yes I did try to get her drunk, no I didn't succeed. See she's not really used to drinking alcohol at all, so after her first drink (an amaretto sour, just about the grisliest non-alcoholic tasting drink I could think of) she started complaining about her stomach wasn't feeling too good. So she only sipped the Woodpecker Cider I got her next (she kept complaining that it tasted too much like beer) and because it took us so long to get there before she was even halfway finished with that it was last call. Despite any of that, we had a really good time, we made the most we could out of being lost, griping exaggeratedly about Jersey roads and what not and we had a lot of fun sharing a drink. I felt a bit like I didn’t fulfill my duty to get her drunk the weekend of her 21st, but it made me feel good that she couldn't drink enough to get there. Because my worst nightmare is her going out to a bar, getting drunk and meeting, well meeting a guy like me (not that I'm an awful person or anything, I just know what guys in bars are thinking and they're not allowed to think that about my baby sister, dammit!!)

The other exciting development from Saturday night was finding out there is a 24hr Dunkin' Donuts about a mile and a half from my parents new house. If there was a 24hr Dunkin' Donuts a block and a half (I figure that's about the city equivalent to a mile and a half in rural Jersey) from my house I'd be in trouble. I feel that my calorie intake would go up by about 200% a day...

We spent Easter at my Aunt Donna and Uncle Bill's place and that was really nice. I've always had a lot a lot of fun with my cousins. I spent the afternoon hanging out with Steve, his wife Trish, Amy and her boyfriend John. Trish and John have really become part of the family over the years, it's cool when family picks people you like to be their significant others. The whole thing got me thinking that maybe if I got to spend a few holiday's with certain members of my mom's family maybe my folk's relocation to Jersey would be all bad.

Nana was her usual pain in the assed self with her camera, but she seemed to do all right once my mother's godmother, Auntie Anne (yes... like the pretzel place, but no unfortunately not named after or owned by her) got there with a 90-year-old friend of hers and they sat in one corner grousing about politics. (Once again I'm going to hell, I know this.)

Well that's pretty much my weekend in review, it was great to see Toby, he seems to be slowly adjusting to the new house, but he was still glued to my side almost the entire time I was up there. (Yes I miss him too...) I did my now standard routine of getting a few hours sleep, then waking up and leaving my parents house at 1am. That drive down was pure Brian Evans. Only a little sleep, middle of the night, music blasting and lots of speed. I did the math and found that I averaged 68.42 mph on the way down, and that includes the back roads around my parent’s house and the last few miles of the trip in DC (it helped that once I hit the road I didn't stop).

I hope all is well in your world my dear readers. I hope you had a happy Easter (if you swing that way). Right now I've got to call my boss and give her the unfortunate news that she has to come in this morning because three most people have already called out for this morning. Have a great week and I'll talk at you later.


-B